one night a few years ago, my friends and i were out drinking in the Lower East Side. i was wearing Onitsuka Tigers (i was heavily into Wing Chun at the time and took many of my fashion cues from Bruce Lee), and some random dude who was trying to pick up my friend commented on the fact that i was wearing sneakers.
"i only go out in shoes that i can run or fight in," i explained.
"oh. have you been sexually assaulted or raped?"
[let’s just sit with the fact that this was his response for a second]